Tag:Mouthing Off From the Catbird Seat
Posted on: February 21, 2008 5:21 pm
Edited on: February 21, 2008 5:24 pm

Blog Day Afternoon: Breaking down the big trade

It's over. I'm going completely off the edge, homerly speaking.

It's Wally's World, son!This 11-player trade between the Bulls, Cavs and Sonics is unprecedented.

Two Miami RedHawks were swapped in the same trade. I repeat, two Miami RedHawks were swapped in the same trade.

Unheard of. Insane. Never in my wildest...

I'm guessing you know the first. His first name rhymes with Paulie and his last name rhymes with, uh, maniac.

But the other guy? Do you know who it is? Think about it.  5, 4, 3, 2 ... Why it's Ira Newble, Wally's old teammate on the '99 Sweet 16 team that beat Utah.

So while the headline talks about Big Ben, Larry Hughes and three-ways, the real story has now been told.

In case you're wondering something like "yo, Kay, this hasn't happened because Miami hasn't had any other players in the league, ever, because it's stupid Miami, stupid."

I say good-day to that, my friend.

Ever heard of Portland-Phoenix legend Phil Lumpkin? No? OK, how about Dave Zeller, he of 90 total career points. Maybe you know Bob Brown, Mr. 36 percent (quite the sharpshooter, don't you think?) in the 1949-50 season. OK, OK. How about Fred Foster, he of 14.8 ppg fame in the 1969-70 season with the Cincinnati Royals? Uh, do you even know hoops? OK, you have to know Wayne Embry. He was called the Goose for crying out loud and he was actually pretty good, as evident by his 10,380 career points from 1958 to 1969. And Goose didn't die...yet. He's a robust 70 years old.

OK, so our history isn't much to brag about. But I did leave one name off. Probably our most famous alum, if only for his love of wristbands in the late '90s. You know who I'm talking about ... Mr. Harper, my pal Harper Lee, the writer of To Kill a Mockingbird. Seriously, it's Ron Harper. He was good in the 1980s and he has three rings. That's worth something, right?

More about Miami (the real one) than you ever thought you'd know, right? That's why I'm here!

On to the best afternoon blogs...around!

Badger's Blog of Random Junk comes clean -- the blogger is "lacking in luminosity."  While I'm no bastion of brightness either, I've done the Target buy-things-I-already-have thing on numerous occassions. It worked out though ... we seem to have an endless bags of salt and pepper chips at our abode.

Continuing down the non-sports path, 'we' rejoice at the findings of Husker's Take. OK, they're not his findings, they're the University of LesbiansUtah's. They're about "nonheterosexual" women and OK, I'm not rejoicing, but it does dispel a lot of that expirementing you come across in college.

Martin Skoula breaks new ground, earning the first Warpy Hat Trick from Mouthing Off From the Catbird Seat. Don't worry though about the Caps. They seemed to have quickly re-learned how to lose games.

Just can't get enought Fantasy football (I have a phone number you can call for help), check in on THE FANTASY LIFE's updated player rankings. It includes Travis Henry and all his life-giving powers as well as two high-profile tight ends.

If you like examining Fantasy team's that aren't your own, give My Fantasy Baseball Team your 2 cents. Personally, I like his squad, it has Moises Alou on it. Anytime you get ol' Pee Hands, you're OK with me.

An optimistic view of things doesn't like how the media is one big Negative Nancy. The blog says "NO one likes being around someone who is negative all of the time." Well, uh, if that's the case ... whatcha doing here? Reading my happy blog, that's what!


Posted on: February 12, 2008 5:47 pm
Edited on: February 12, 2008 6:15 pm

Blog Day Afternoon: He'll pump you up

Uno looks to be No. 1. Chelsea's being "pimped." But first, Verne Troyer's 15 minutes of fame just expired.

I lift weights, and I am weights!Introducing Aditya "Romeo" Dev, the world's smallest bodybuilder. Standing 2-9, Romeo weighs 20 pounds, but can lift 3.3-pound weights over his head. That's nearly 16.5 percent of his body weight. If you weigh 205 pounds, you'd have to lift 34 pounds over your head to match that. OK, so that's not the best way to talk this guy up. The best way is to simply check out his photos.

He's blonde. He has a mustache. He wears shorts with animals see-sawing and he dances. What more do you want?

Maybe some Jazzy B. That's Romeo's dream, to perform with Punjabi pop star Jazzy B. According to his website, Jazzy B "packs an enormous tidal wave of a punch ... and is one of the most prominent stars of Punjabi music in the 21st century." I can see why being the likely strongest dwarf in the world wouldn't be enough.

So long Mini-me, it's the real Lil Romeo's time.

Scarlett Johansson before the work?"Pimping," but not the Clinton you think

 Apparently Jack Donaghy doesn't like when General Electric employees use the word "pimp." MSNBC host David Shuster asked two guests recently, "Doesn't it seem as if Chelsea [Clinton] is sort of being pimped out in some weird sort of way?"

This led to a firestorm response from the Clinton camp (do they know any other type of response?) about associating their daughter with the word "pimp." Well, despite pimp's mainstream success of late (Pimp My Ride, Big Pimpin', Katt Williams' schtick), it's apparently still a no-no word. Why? Slate.com's Jesse Sheidlower explains the origins of the word.

Oh, completely relevant and mildly tasteless ... is Chelsea sort of becoming a poor, poor, poor man's Scarlett Johansson?

Personally, I like Captain better...

Scout.com released its' best names list of the class of 2008. Top honors go to a Florida Atlantic defensive tackle who guys by the name of Yourhighness Morgan.

Don't call me Snoopy!Sit, Ubu, sit ... then destroy

And congrats to Uno, our beagle who made it through the hounds group at the Westminster Kennel Club Annual Dog Show and will now look to bring home the breeds' first-ever Best In Show collar.

What do you have to say about that, Buck Laughlin?

"Excuse me if this off the subject a little bit, but just take a guess at how much I can bench press. Come on, what do you think? Take a guess. 315 pounds, at the top of my game, maxing out at 500! "

Thanks, I guess.

On to the best ... blogs around!

If you're not buying what John Rocker, steroids outer, is selling, then BigPapiandManny's 3-4 Punch has something you may agree with: John Rocker, SHUT THE HELL UP!

Wait, we have more Rocker ..

Do you like competitive biking? If so, there's a race called The Tour of California and Who cares about these sports? gives the 411 (so 2003, I know) on all the teams competing.

***Watch out Scott Miller, Matt Abedi's Sporting Universe has a solid NL West preview worth reading.***

Fresh off the Patriots' perfect regular season, the Memphis Tigers are looking like they may move into Perfectville. Mind of The Big B wonders about that neighborhood.

Texas has already defeated three top six schools. Parrish: The Thoughts says Memphis should be scared, very scared come selection Sunday.

Josh Harding gets A Top Quark. Nik Backstrom gets Up Quarks. Refs get Bottom Quarks. And if you have any idea what I'm talking about or want to, read Mouthing Off From the Catbird Seat. It's better than playing dead.

***indicates the chef's blog du jour

Posted on: January 22, 2008 5:41 pm
Edited on: January 22, 2008 5:55 pm

Blog Day Afternoon: Don't leave work without 'em

I don't know if anybody remembers this, but when the Giants and Ravens were in the Super Bowl back in 2001, there was a segment one of the networks did about how great buds Brian Billick and Jim Fassel were.

It showed them boating together with their families co-mingling. It was sweet, it tugged at the hearts, if you were talking about it on IM you'd probably drop a BFF at some point of the conversation.

I'm guessing that segment really touched Danny Snyder. Ever since he inherited sunburned ol' Norv Turner back in 1999, he's been looking for his next best friend. It just so happens that buddy also has to have this job description: head coach of the Redskins.

He tried Marty Schottenheimer. Too cold.

He tried Steve Spurrier. Too hot.

He tried Joe Gibbs. Ah, just right. But Gibbs had a family of his own to tend to.

So now it's time to find his next toy, er friend, and all indicators pointed to Gregg Williams. He was Gibbs' friend, so you'd think he'd enjoy being Danny's friend, right?

Uh-oh. Apparently Gregg isn't Jack Brown-enough for Eric Bates, er Danny.

So Danny now has that guy from the segment he saw one day before the Super Bowl in line for the job of being head coach-friend.

Despite the fact it means another coaching overhaul in D.C. Despite the fact teams without continuity rarely find success. Despite the fact Jim Fassel fits every meaning of the word "retread" in a game that's heavy on innovation.

For the first time in a long, long time this season being a Redskins fan felt special. It felt like we had the right kind of momentum going forward. That will all be wiped away when Francis, er, Danny, gets his new shiny bike, er friend, er puppeteer-coach Jim Fassel. Excuse me while I call my friend with the couch, Dr. Rosenstein.

In other news, RIP Heath Ledger. A Knight's Tale is an extremely underrated comedy and I'm looking forward to your take on our favorite prankster villain.

On to the best ... blogs around!

Speaking of comedies, (Insert Name Here) shares his Top 20. RSILI! is saddened to see a lack of respect for The Naked Gun ... and Dr. Strangelove. But that's a different debate.

Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards. Vijaykanth can throw Brett Favre even further. Who is Vijaykanth (look below)?  He's also the outsourced version of Chuck Norris. The Words of Dezy explains.

Blog Day Afternoon regular The Sports Comedian has some "breaking" news. Apparently a torn ACL wasn't the only thing hobbling Philip Rivers Sunday. The quarterback also had a broken heart. I hear duct tape fixes that.

On the day the Academy Award nominees are announced Mouthing Off From the Catbird Seat has his Warpy Awards. If you like the Wild or are from Minnesota, click the link. Otherwise, well, try clicking below.

If you enjoy big words like pontificating, lambasting, infomongering and the, check out Letters from The Den's facts of the day.

If you like Pac-10 basketball -- only communists don't! -- check out NaterB's Junk Drawer's preview of the upcoming week. It's thorough, just like Maude Lebowski's doctor.

 Still confused by the new ratings system? Building CBS Sports.com explains it all.

The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author and do not reflect the views of CBS Sports or CBSSports.com