Tag:The Blog to End All Blogs
Posted on: April 21, 2008 11:54 am
Edited on: April 21, 2008 4:22 pm
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Alpha Blog: The year of the sports woman

It's shaping up to be quite a year for women in sports.

Danica Patrick became the first female winner in Indycar history Sunday, winning the Indy Japan 300.

(Actually this is a landmark victory because she and I are both 26 and up until late Saturday night I could always say something like "well, what's she ever done? We're the same age and neither of us have won an Indy race. I don't see the big deal in her." So I'm kinda upset I've lost that chauvenistic ammunition.)

Danica Patrick is no longer just that type of trophy wife. Lorena Ochoa became the first LPGA Tour player in 45 years to win four tournaments in consecutive weeks. It's also her fifth victory in six starts this year.

(Actually, this is a landmark victory because she and I are both 26 and up until Sunday morning I could always say something like, "well, what's Lorena Ochoa ever done? we're both the same age and neither of us have ever won four straight LPGA tournaments.")

Ana Ivanovic

Just a few weeks back (Not on April 1 mind you) our very own Mike Freeman penned a landmark column about how the women's college Hugs for Pat Summitt,basketball game is better than the men's.

Pat Summitt won her eighth national title, is approaching 1K wins and is featured in her own ESPN commercial with Kenny Mayne.

Speaking of ESPN, Dana Jacobson is probably a better drinker than Chris Berman.

Hillary Clinton is probably a better bowler than Barack Obama.

Let's ask now touring Chris Rock what he thinks of Hillary as president:

"I think America's ready for a woman president . . . just not that woman. Being married to somebody doesn't make you good at their job. I've been with my wife 10 years now. If she got up here right now, y'all wouldn't laugh. At all. You get on a plane tomorrow, you want the pilot's wife flying you?"

Thanks, Chris.

Reading the Washington Post on the plane this morning, I noticed a section devoted to the NBA. I looked closer and found a W in front of the word, "NBA." Yep, women have their own league.

And co-ed sports are all the rage.

How about 'dem cranberries?


On to the best four blogs ... around!  Dave Krieg    

I didn't the read the whole thing (it's really, really long), but The Bong Zone begins a tremendous read/debate on the idea of quarterbacks. I'll be printing it out and taking it to my, uh, office later. Speaking of Dave Krieg, here's a Facebook group devoted to him.

The Blog to End All Blogs watched some basketball this past weekend and came to this conclusion: The Lakers are the only team that plays "team ball."

It may sound weird, but the Cubs are getting some good starting pitching this season. It's Gonna Happen in 2008 breaks down week 3 in Cubs Nation.

If you really like Week 3 analysis, don't stop reading with the Cubs. Check in on the Yankees after three weeks courtesy of It's up to you....


Klick of the Day         

Found this great clip of karate expert Bob Jackson (In Living Color) while surfing on YouTube. Jim Carrey used to be real, real funny.

Posted on: April 15, 2008 12:35 pm
Edited on: April 15, 2008 12:54 pm
 

Alpha Blog: K.C. to Oakland, losers lookin' good

If there's one thing the porn industry has taught me, it's not how you start, but how you finish.

Now, that's not a stab at coming out guns blazing. But endurance is key in this game. Powder blue unis, is there anything they can't do?

What the heck are we talking about?

I forget. But it has to do with baseball -- oh yeah, teams with good records, unexpectedly speaking.

I'm looking at Oakland, Baltimore, Kansas City, Florida and St. Louis. Which one of these teams are A. the biggest surprise and B. likely to sustain success?

Uh, probably none of them. But St. Louis has the best chance, followed by Kansas City and Oakland.

Speaking of Oakland, is there any team better at turning chicken s*** into chicken salad?

Future Yankee Dana Eveland is lights out. Future Red Sock Greg Smith just shut down the potent White Sox and future body donated to the study of science Rich Harden will probably be the best under-15-start pitcher in baseball. The team hits like the Lovely Ladies, but should keep Billy Beane's in-game destructive tendencies at bay.

As for Kansas City, as long as this team is wearing the powder blues, who can't like them? Brian Bannister, Zack Greinke and Gil Meche are a jab, hook, uppercut trifecta, pending Gil "freakin'" Meche's healthy and when Luke Hochevar gets called up, yowzer. Plus, Billy "Rube" Butler is a professional hitter and Alex Gordon may soon wipe that smug look off David Wright's face when the conversation switches to best third baseman in the league.

And St. Louis can't be counted out as long as Dave Duncan keeps papier-mâchéing pitching arms together like's he's been doing since the Paleolithic Era.

So I'll go with K.C., Oakland and St. Louis as my three maybe-they-could-be sustainable sexy picks. But like good porn, it's not about my thoughts, it's about your feelings. Who ya like to be hanging around the set come late August?


The Blog to End All Blogs is hooked on Bass. On to the best four blogs ... around!

 

Highlight shows reward offense, Outside the Paint rewards defense (of defence). And that means big props to two Celtics, a Laker, a Rocket and a Piston. 

Sticking with the NBA, The Blog to End All Blogs gives a little respect to what I consider the Ledell Eackleses (underappreciated) of the league.

While MLB teams in Trouble Early has a good About section (Got 'stache) and features a solid take on the Eastern Conference Playoffs, I'm not sure about Big Z hitting those clutch treys for the Cavs against the Bullets.

Sexy avatars have Collected and Conveyed. a bit upset. The blogger reaches out and hopes to touch his fellow community members with a plea to put them away.


Klick of the Day  

This week in our newsroom Fantasy baseball league, I'm playing Al Harrington. Not the Warriors forward, but this guy.

Posted on: April 8, 2008 1:06 pm
Edited on: April 8, 2008 3:47 pm
 

Alpha Blog: How the 'stache was won ... or lost

Tom Selleck.  Burt Reynolds.  As you can see, mustaches ruled the Wild West. David Crosby. Gung HoRollie Fingers. Ned Flanders. President Skroob. Sal Fasano.

And now Buzz Fagan.

Who's Buzz Fagan? Legendary CBSSports.com newsroom editor Buzz Fagan is the latest American hero to sport the mustache. That's what happens when you make a bracket bet with me. I take that back. That's when you somehow fill out a worse bracket than me.

I had Georgetown winning it all, vs. UCLA in the final. I also had Texas in my Final Four. And UNC. I'm not s-m-r-t. I mean s-m-a-r-t.

As for Buzz, well, this is what happens when you fill out your bracket in "10 minutes tops." His Final Four was UNC (nice pick), Texas (OK, I did that oopsy too), USC (LOL) and UConn (ROFL). Luckily my D.C. bias wasn't as harmful as his New England bias.

So we deemed the month-long tourney Mustache Madness and the loser had to sport the 'stache for a week. Harnessing the awesome power of apples, I grew a manly beard in preparation for losing (I did have Georgetown after all).

Try not to get distracted by my beard while marveling at his 'stache.(My "biological" father was either Robin Williams or a Chia Pet. C'mon mom, make with the truth.)

But if not for Kansas' win over UNC, I was Mr. Mustache for this week. And I was getting ready. I did all my usual errands -- from grocery shopping to Oriental massages -- in preparation of going from work to home from home to work with as little human interaction as possible. No mas for me. I can do normal things -- except shave. As you can tell my beard is uber-manly, and it's taking over my life.

It's so long, small creatures are nesting in it.
It's so face covering, I don't need sunblock. (face covering, yeah, that can't be a real term)
It's so manly, Stetson is asking me to pose for ads.
It's so greasy, I'm a hockey player.
And as assistant managing editor, staff writer and Power Ranker Lyle Crouse says, "with great beard, comes great responsibility."
However, George Maselli, says it's "serviceable," as in Matt Chico "serviceable." Phooey.
Plus, I really stand out in the office -- in that HR wants to talk to you sort of way. Never! And lay off my stapler.

I do plan on sporting a sympathy 'stache Friday when I finally take razor to beard. But if there are two things this tournament has taught me they are: never pick against somebody with a name that reads Stephen but rhymes with Geffen and always ask not what your beard can do for you, ask what you can do for your beard.

Anybody wanna wager on the hockey playoffs?


On to the best four blogs...around!Upon hearing his own voice, Dicky V realizes he's made a huge mistake.   

Dick Vitale alongside Chick Hearn in the Basketball Hall of Fame? Battling my inner demons
is getting delivery tonight.

Intentional fouling has The Blog to End All Blogs ticked off -- and claiming Kansas' win is artificial. Can't agree with that. If it's allowed within the boundaries of the game's rules, it's just strategy. You want to restore the integrity of the game, strip away two timeouts and stop letting the coaches micromanage the last two minutes. Let the kids play it out and execute what they've practiced all season.

Covering the bases breaks down early season surprises who just may keep the hotness going.

I was planning on doing a Western Conference hockey preview today, but the 'stache had to be talked about. So while I'll say Calgary has Cup potential written all over it, Gumby's Rocky Mountain Rants makes a case for the Avs.


Klick of the Day    

I'm not sure whether I want this guy putting together my Royale with cheese, but I like his style. (courtesy of Sean's Spontaneous Loquacity)

Posted on: April 6, 2008 12:26 pm
Edited on: April 8, 2008 3:52 pm
 

Alpha Blog: Max Mosley pulls a serious Spitzer

Max Mosley likes his sex with a dash of SS.

In case you missed it, Formula 1's boss is Max Mosley.

Max Mosley brings a new twist to the term sexual deviant.Max Mosley allegedly uses hookers. One of those hookers told a publication called News of the World about what she was hired to do with, or rather, to, Max Mosley.

She would dress up like Dr. Elsa Schneider and flog Max Mosley until he bled. This is just the beginning, though. Add four more hookers, more flogging, barking and now we've got a Mosley-approved evening. Allegedly, this would go on for five hours.

"Viagra is one helluva drug," says CBSSports.com editor George Maselli.

Eliot Spitzer says, "the Emperor's Club would never condone such behavior."

Charlton Heston says, "get your hands off me you dirty Nazi hookers."

Ian McKellen, star of Naz-com Apt Pupil says, "we always wondered why Mosley hung around the set so much."

The article gets in to some of the details of the evening. Essentially, just add video cameras and more floggings to the mix and you'll complete the picture.

Max Mosley denies all this.

"I was the victim of a disgusting conspiracy. It goes without saying that the so-called Nazi element is pure fabrication."

I'm not sure what "fabrication" means, but I’m guessing it's something like "delicious," or "ecstasy."


On to the best four blogs ... around!      

Can't wait until Tuesday for Lyle Crouse's Power Rankings? Our resident basketball guru The Blog to End All Blogs is there for ya -- and I can't find anything to gripe about. Then again, who really gets worked up for Power Rankings?

Our other basketball maven, Mind of The Big B, offers up this spicy nugget: He's switched his MVP vote (because CBSSports.com bloggers have official votes) away from Kobe to Chris Paul. I like it, only because I appreciate people with two first names.

Like irony? Like Dwight Howard? Intrigued by paternity suits. That's just the first of The Blasphemous Zeitgeist Speaks' bizarre news of the week.

The Marlins are off to a 3-2 start and are "atop" the NL East. Reason to start believing that this club may not finish fourth? Don Juan's Sports Thoughts is starting to lean that way, which is ridiculous, since my Nats will lock down the four spot. We don't have much pitching (Matt Chico aside), but we do have more than the Fish. Mark Hendrickson? C'mon.


Klick of the Day      

The top 10 baseball movie MVPs, according to EW. Tell me what you think, but the only notable snub is Ham Porter from the Sandlot.

Posted on: April 2, 2008 12:08 pm
 

Alpha Blog: Here I go again on my ... Cabrera

I do this every season. Maybe you do it to.

There's just one guy I always draft with the hope this is the year. The year he breaks out.

Maybe yours is Rocco Baldelli.

Maybe yours is Austin Kearns. The look of an ace?

Maybe yours is Ervin Santana.

Mine is Daniel Cabrera.

The 26-year-old Cabrera takes the mound tonight (7 ET) vs. the Tampa Bay Rays with the understanding among Fantasy players this is likely the year he goes from having "potential" to being a "stud" or a "bust."

That's pretty much the only evolutionary scale we can use with this guy at this stage. He's been hyped for so long. And rightly so. He has the size (6-7), the velocity and he's shown flashes of "it." Remember that near no-no vs. the Yankees in 2006? Remember his .235 batting average against in 2005? Remember last season's 3-2 May with a complete game? Of course, he pairs up these Peter Lugar strips with Natty Light way too often, leaving a bitter taste in whatever remaining Orioles fans there are and wide-eyed Fantasy players.

And he's at that age, 26, where you have to make with the goods. This is it. This is the year he becomes Chris Young or this is the year he becomes Eric Milton. His arch can only evolve from "he has potential" to "he's a bust" or "he's a rising star." There probably won't be an in-between with Cabrera. He'll either get it or he won't. There are few out there who think this guy can fit CBSSports.com editor extraordinaire George Maselli's definition of "serviceable."

Please, please figure it out buddy. Chico 2 Chico: Nats Justice needs ya.


On to the best four blogs ... around!

He's "clever." He "CAN coach." He can "recruit Chicago." He'll bring back the "Knight crowd." When it comes to The Verbal Scourging's Ricky Rubiotake on the coach, it seems the only thing Tommy can't do is bring Arrested Development back to network TV.

There's definitely a good case to be made for the European approach to nurturing future basketball stars. The Blog to End All Blogs brings attention to the next bright light -- Ricky Rubio (right) -- and why the Spaniard has an edge over flavor of the month Stephen Curry, et al.

Ever get frustrated when you see the Man of the Year awards buried in the agate while Pacman gets homepage love? In Love with the Game, Mom's View does, but at least she's doing something about it. Us here? We can't gen enough conflict news. Just take a gander at the homepage Hansbrough vs. Love debate. Now that's helping humanity!

I find four blogs. Dantheman4250's Sports Blog shares five things learned from Tuesday. Advantage DTM. Included is Pedro Martinez analysis, which makes me ask the question: Are the Mets really going to rely on him? Really? REALLY?

Blog du jour


Klick of the Day

The worst Rick Roll...ever.

If you have a good link to share, post below or send a PM and I'll highlight it later in the week.

Posted on: March 24, 2008 11:32 am
Edited on: March 24, 2008 12:14 pm
 

Alpha Blog: I can beat up 21 5-year-olds

There are plenty of questions that keep me up night.

Why are Wendy's spicy chicken sandwiches so good?

Somebody stop that 5-year-old from choking that man! How excited will I be Sunday night when I attend the opener of Nationals Park?

Why do people like mayo?

And most importantly: How many 5-year-olds could I beat up?

I know what you're thinking.

"Eric, you could probably take 10, maybe a baker's dozen."

I say good day to that notion.

My "moral compass" is way more flexbile than you think.

I'm good for a solid 21 of those little buggers -- and if it weren't for my, uh, lack of reach, I'd probably be able to bulldoze my way through 25 or more.

So in the spirit of continuing to crush office productivity while March Madness takes a breather, check out this site: http://www.howmanyfiveyearoldscould
youtakeinafight.com/


On to the best four blogs ... around!  

There are 162 games in a season. And It's Gonna Happen in 2008 has 162 predictions for the season. I chalk that up to coincidence. I also chalk up calling Dan Haren a bust to being a delusional Cubs fan. However, I do like Ryan Zimmerman's Gold Glove chances.

Upset with CBS' coverage of yesterday's exciting finishes? dook's buzz! is, and I have two suggestions: Fire up the MMOD on a laptop in order to keep the game on no matter what the suits in NYC switch your TV to and/or take Greg Gumbel off your Christmas card list.

I think we can all relate to Tiger Talking at one point. The blog is pissed to high Hades at the Cardinals, who have driven the blogger to such tender remarks as: "Chris Duncan makes me want to walk on the field and slap him so hard his eye bleeds." I feel that way about my Redskins, who seemingly every year operate in a style contrary to all established paths to success.

Our favorite NBA blogger, The Blog to End All Blogs goes off on the NBA age limit. While good natured and provoking, g8trfan_1 pretty much takes down the argument with one main talking point: while they can't outright discriminate, private corporations can set many hiring standards -- such as a reasonable age limit.

Posted on: March 11, 2008 11:31 am
Edited on: March 11, 2008 2:36 pm
 

Alpha Blog: Your brackets vs. Parrish, again

It's silly to even bring this up. But we're silly people here. The Heat have 20 games remaining. And you know something? They may not win any of them.

Tie feeling a little tight, Pat Riley?I know, I know. No team finishes on what would be a 25-game losing skid. But if there's any team that can make a run at this, the Heat are doing their best. Their coach has checked out. Their star is off making "appearances" at his new restaurants. They have a Mark Blount, and a Ricky Davis, to boot.

They lose games like last night's heartbreaker to the Clippers (they can't even trip their way to a win).

Shawn Marion can only do so much.

Chris Quinn? 'Nuff said. Sorry CBSSports.com sales guru David Salinas. Apparently, they're BFF or something.

If DNP's were a favorable metric, this team would have locked up a playoff berth right now.

OK, so I'm looking at the schedule and when your team still has games against foes like New York, Milwaukee, Memphis and Indiana, you're bound to get a win somewhere in there.

But wouldn't it just be something if they didn't? Oh, the schadenfreude!

So they probably will get a win at some point. I just hope it's in their final game, against a team that just took a "doubleheader" against you. No better way to stop a potential 25-game losing streak heading into 2008-'09 than by beating the team that won the league's first "doubleheader" in 25 years. Maybe I'll watch that finale at D Wade's Sports Grill.


On to the best blogs ... around!    

Baseball Bloggin'

Sorry fellow Nats fans, but despite two-ninths of our roster potentially being filled by Boone's, I won't expect a cheap wine sponsorship coming Brett's way. Scott Miller's Bull Pennings reports.

You don't know who Blake Davis is, but after you get through My never ending Story......, you will. Hint: He's stuck on the depth chart behind Brandon Fahey.

The Wonderful World of Gonos does the unthinkable -- compiles the all-time Rays Fantasy lineup. Rolando Arrojo, wow.

Bracketology Bloggin'

My Fantasy Baseball Team has a simple question: WHY DOES EVERYONE HATE STANFORD????????????????. (Warning: If the subject line wasn't bad enough, there are blatant Elaine Benis uses of punctuation throughout the blog)What's that Jim, a 10 seed for Syracuse?

dbacksfan414 has Kentucky as an 8 seed. Gary Parrish has the Wildcats as a 10 seed. I'm with Parrish on this one. While the turnaround is a good story, this is still an 18-win team at the moment and the road wins aren't impressive.

Steady Bloggin has Kent State as a 12 seed. Gary Parrish has the Flashes as a 10 seed. Call me Goldilocks, I like them as an 11 seed if they win out.

Dantheman4250's College Basketball Blog has the Miami (Hurricanes) as a 7 seed. Gary Parrish has them as a 9 seed. A win vs. N.C. State and they're no worse than a 9. That, plus a win or two in the tourney and we may be talking 7. I like those road wins vs. VCU and Miss. State.

Bryan's Babbling has Syracuse as a 9 seed. Gary Parrish has the Orange an 11 seed. It would take a nice win at Villanova to get me to buy them as a 9 seed. Without a solid Big East tourney run, I think we're looking at a 10 at best, but more likely an 11.

If you made me pick a likely champion right here, right now. I'd agree with Hunter21's Blog.

Jason Wells is like every other blogger. He has Maryland as a bubble team. No way the Terps get into the tourney unless they make the ACC finals. Gary Williams has had better coaching seasons.

Ballyhooing Bloggin'

The Blog to End All Blogs is mad, and not going to take it anymore. He hates the ratings system and love fests. So do we, so do we. The latter that is. 

Posted on: February 6, 2008 5:32 pm
Edited on: February 6, 2008 6:02 pm
 

Blog Day Afternoon: Delivery? It's Dicky V!

Things I learned about Dick Vitale from a New York Times article. (Sorry for the lack of link, the tool is being a real PITA).

He's 68 years old. (I would have said 63)

He gets three Mercedes just through endorsement deals. (What no Broughams?)

He wasn't allowed to speak for a month, using only a Legends of the Fall-ian type chalk board (OK, Dry-Erase) to communicate with people.

He had the cajones to call someone a "young Lou Holtz" (ouch).

And Vitale never thought he was doing any damage to his voice by carrying on about Dookies and diaper dandies like he rountinely did.

“I just always thought I had this loud way about me, you know, the throat became my sound, whether it was clear or not,” he said. “It’s helped me make my living.”

Welcome back Vitale, after all, watching a Duke-UNC game without you ruining it would be like watching Cadyshack 2 without Jackie Mason. 


Hi I'm your new boss, Nolan Ryan

There's probably not a connection here. But on the same day former player Steve Kerr acquired aging and crumbling Shaq, the Texas Rangers hired ex-player Nolan Ryan as president. Now, of course, former players can make good executives, but it's a whole heckuva lot easier to rattle of the name of bad ex-player GMs or presidents (Kevin McHale, Isiah Thomas, Ozzie Newsome, Matt Millen...) than it is the good ones (Jerry West, Ernie Grunfeld, Billy Beane).

It's just if I'm an owner, I'm probably not going to turn my management structure over to a former player, someone who spent 20-some years of his life playing the game. I'd rather have someone who spent 20-some years thinking analytically about the game, and who won't put me in a headlock for saying something like, "strikeouts don't define a pitcher."


From the coach's mouth

 "I'm proud of Tyler Dierkers," Coles said. "He might be our leader, and I never thought he could lead anything. I thought he was just a jovial guy -- a happy-go-lucky guy -- but he's had some big ballgames this year. He's growing. I hope he keeps growing. He's smart, anyway -- good grades and everything -- but he's really come out this year and is showing us he cares."

-- Miami RedHawks coach Charlie Coles on setting the bar real low for one of his players.  


On to the best ... blogs around!

The Suns are notoriously cheap. Shaq is notoriously expensive. The Blog to End All Blogs is confused. And upset. And throwing around mean words like, "Isiah Thomas."

I admit I skim, scan, peruse and even glance at stories. And I get in trouble for it sometimes. But this whole Gisele Bundchen running naked thing is taking idiocy to a new level. I'm lookin at you, FOOTBALL 365.

Never shy to ask the tough questions in life, The Blog about Nothing inquires: What is your favorite Seinfeld episode? I'm fond of "Shrinkage" and this one, where Kramer gets his hands on an old Merv Griffin set.

Mock drafts, fake breasts and real breasts (how eclectic) are just a few of the Wonderful World of Gonos' favorite things. Oh, and Ben Sheets makes a funny.

Think adjusting to Phoenix's high-octane offense will be Shaq's toughest test? Think again says The Sports Comedian. It's Dr. Sameer Pendalooza.

If you're into crazy draft-day scenarios -- who isn't? -- involving the Bears, read Big Bad Bears Blog.  

 
 
 
 
The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author and do not reflect the views of CBS Sports or CBSSports.com